If you’re a meat lover who wants a full cultural experience, a Brazilian steakhouse—or churrascaria—is the place to go. For a flat fee that usually starts at $50, diners get an endless parade of skewered meats cooked over an open flame. Servers known as gauchos stop by tables with everything from filet mignon to lamb chops, carving slices straight onto plates.
There’s also a salad bar stocked with Brazilian side dishes, from rice and beans to pão de queijo, the famous cheese bread.
Because it’s not exactly a cheap meal, people often want to leave feeling like they got every penny’s worth. To that end, comedian and TikTok creator Ben Jones (@benjonescomedy) posted a tongue-in-cheek “strategic guide” for beginners.
His video got more than 749,000 views.
How To Get The Most Out Of Your Steakhouse Trip
“So you’re going to the Brazilian steakhouse, and you want to rock and roll with the big boys. Well, here’s how you do it,” Jones says at the start.
He warns the place isn’t for casual eaters: “If you don’t fancy yourself a carnivore, respectfully, there’s nothing for you here. Stay home.”
The first tip is to arrive early. “It’s a slow and steady race. It’s not a sprint. They’re gonna feed you meat until you say ‘Uncle,’ and you want as much time as possible,” he says.
Next, he suggests you avoid the trap foods.
“Don’t even touch the bread. Don’t look at it. It might as well be a decorative centerpiece,” he notes. “They want you to eat that bread—that’s how they’re gonna get you.”
He suggests making a plate from the salad bar but leaving it to the side as a palate cleanser for later.
Then the gauchos appear. Or, as Jones calls them, “these guys called gaspachos or guachos or gaucho something.”
Gauchos bring the meat on skewers, which Jones describes as “a crack dealer on the street,” and diners need to be ready. But not every offering is worth the stomach space.
“Like the chicken, the sausages—those are cheap,” he states. “Stay away from those as much as possible. Save your room for the prime rib, the filet, the different cuts of beef. That’s where you can really party.”
He adds practical warnings too: “Use little tongs. Don’t be shoving your fingers up there with the sharp objects. That’s how you pull back a nub.” And if it gets overwhelming, he suggests you flip the card on your table to red and take a break.
“You’re supposed to leave there sweaty as hell. The meat sweats,” he concludes. “Enjoy some pineapple on your way out—it’s really good.”
But, he admits, recovery is rough. “The last time I ate at a Brazilian steakhouse, I thought I had stomach cancer for three days. There will be blood.”
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Not All Commenters Agree
Not everyone agreed with Jones’ “make the most out of it” strategy.
One viewer argued, “You don’t go to a Brazilian steakhouse to get your money’s worth, you go there to experience Brazilian culture and cuisine.”
They added that skipping staples like pão de queijo or linguiça sausage misses the point. They said, “Don’t miss out on an incredible experience because it’s expensive. If that’s your concern, go eat somewhere else.”
Others offered add-ons to his strategy. “Eat the pineapple between meats. It helps digest the food so you can have more meat,” one person advised.
Another jokingly suggested, “Pro tip, don’t drive. Be a passenger prince and nap on the way home.”
Someone else encouraged learning prime cuts by name—like tomahawk or ancho chorizo—and asking directly, since those might not make the skewer rotation unless requested.
BroBible has reached out to Jones via Instagram direct messages for more information.